Sex. It's a trip.
Once upon a time I thought that Sex was only good if you were in deep inlovedness.
That Sex was a deal heavily laden with great amounts of emotion and spiritual importance.
It was not that I had ever experienced mind-blowing Sex under these conditions, to the contrary, Sex has always been a little disappointing. Even when I thought I was ‘deeply’ in love.
So I always felt as if I wasn’t in Love enough or something.
Perhaps I was autistic in love?
A tad slow. Detached. Too self involved.
After my recent break up I decided that it was obvious I needed to have no Sex whatsoever. I was about to embark on this journey of celibacy (I did it before for nearly 2 years). I was all set for it, but then I had this conversation with a friend in her kitchen.
Over perogies and fried onion she told me about her cousin from Israel who radiated sexual energy. How that vibe affected everyone around her. In my mind I imagined that scene in ‘Like Water for Chocolate’ where everyone who ate the pheasant with rose petals was overcome with raunchiness.
Something inside me flicked. A little Sex switch.
OK. It’s time to have Sex.
But with Who? When? Where?
Then it struck me…
www.craigslist.org
I put up and ad and found a willing man to help me out with my needs. Although I consider myself queer, I felt that it was time for some penis in my life.
I will call my first emailer Mr. White.
Mr. White was rather ordinary. I wasn’t satisfied.
Back to craigslist. Changed my ad.
Curvy woman seeks older man for rendezvous.
Come over to my place. We get stoned, We laugh, you massage me. We have sex.
You must be able to make me laugh.
88 emails and half an hour later…
I make my choice. It’s this mans' picture that seals it, he is cute in a regular way, plus I reckon that I could probably beat him in an arm wrestle. So I return his email.
Mr. Silver. Now Mr. Silver was a funny guy with a hairy belly but a knack for doing accents. An ex-actor now teacher in the Bronx, who had me laughing during Sex, and that is ALWAYS a good thing.OK well not always, but in this case it was perfect.
Mr. Silver and I got ourselves stoned, he gave me a massage and several orgasms.
Praise the Lord.
After he left I suddenly felt so alive.
Sex had woken me up, a shrilling alarm to my napping self. I had been sleeping. I had forgotten what good, fun, sex was like.
Next I wanted some grrl Sex. As it is so much yummier.
The sticky part is that I have always had a really bad time having sex with a woman that I wasn’t in love with, men were easier. Women were intimate. I could never quite let go of that in my head. Believe me, if I told you about my first casual sex experience with a woman, you would understand. That’s for another time though, it is its own story.
This is where a special individual comes into the picture. I’ll call her Miss A+. Now Miss A+ is my new friend. We have been hanging out a lot and I have been feeling that she likes me. Although I have been doing the "Oh I cannot date, I am still hung up on Miss X" thing.
Luckily for me Miss A+ persisted.
On Labor day we hung out in the prospect park and ate some special cookies.
Giggles and flirting abounded. We laid on a sari in the grass near the boathouse. It was a lovely afternoon. Back to my place...
It took a few hours to built up to the snog. Fingers brushing against clothing, running hands along the fabric. You know how it goes.
Move on to the bed to ‘watch a streaming movie on the PC,' head on shoulder, eyes closed for a moment. Taxiing along on the runway toward a kiss.
In my head I am thinking ‘hope she is a good kisser, hope she is a good kisser’
A wishful mantra to complete a wonderful day.
Then finally we kiss.
The great thing about kissing is that you know if someone is good or not within milliseconds.
And yes. She was good. Better than good. This girl excelled.
She shot up to the top 10 of snogs. Though I don’t have a top 10, I barely can count 3 worth mentioning.
Miss A + hits the number 2 position with a bullet. Or a tongue twirl at the case may be.
I will take a short detour to tell you about the one who just beats her.
Insert a sigh here. For this kiss I am going to tell you about, is one of those kisses that sets the standard. It is the blue ribbon that has been in my heart for 5 years.
I’ll call her Superoo.
Originally she was the gf of my male best friend. He would talk about her ALL the time, but she was 3000 km away on the other side of Australia.
I was curled up on the couch stoned out of my head watching Xena and wishing I could be a better queer grrl, not spending my nights at home watching Lucy Lawless "ieieieieieieieieieie" at me.
There was a knock at the door.
I yelled come in as we never locked our doors.
In comes my buddy, he pokes his head around the doorway and smiles at my stoned curled up self.
"Hey Spaniel " he adds ‘sp’ to every ones names.
"Meet Superoo"
And there like an apparition, past the doorway architraving
Superoos' most beautiful face appears. She has a short, short hair and a nose ring. This grrl is perfect. This grrl is fucking unbelievable. I cannot remember the exact way I greeted her. But in my head I see myself jump up off the couch, grabbing Superoo under my arm and running off into the wilderness with her.
I think I just drooled a little out of the side of my mouth, as Homer does with donuts.
Shoot forward 6 months.
Best Friends. Superoo is no longer the gf of my buddy.
I am so in love with her.
It’s a cool night at an arty thing in downtown Perth. I am wearing antenna’s made of pipecleaners and fuzzy balls.
We get our photo taken together by the local press. Yes, we are that cute.
After a while we are standing around, neither of us are too thrilled with the vibe. Superoo turns to me and says "wanna snog"
DO I?!! Need not ask me twice.
We sat on the edge of a gutter opposite a portaloo row.
I understand that doesn’t sound very romantic, but it wasn’t about romance. This was entirely about something else, only I am not sure what exactly.
That moment just before kissing is the most delicious. Nose’s touching , breath intermingling. When our lips finally touched I had those bungy jumps in the belly. That intense pulling that makes you giddy and dreamy.
(I have never got that bungy thing from kissing a guy. That’s the main reason I think I am queer).
Now I cannot be too sure how long we snogged for, but I do know that the party crowd was a lot thinner when we started. There was this young guy who sat across from us , totally engrossed in us. Hell I would have been if I was a bystander. Shit, 2 grrls snogging will stop most people in their tracks.
Furthermore we looked very cute.
Superoo you are my #1.
Back to now…
Miss A+ is one of the sexiest creatures I have ever had the pleasure to sleep with, she is totally open and in her body. That is what makes good sex. Being in your body and not off thinking about what you need at the stupidmarket or who’s birthday you might have forgotten in the past week. That is the key.
Miss A + has also taught me that you don’t need the complication of inlovedness to have fantastic, liberating, wonderful sex.
Miss A+ you might not be #1 on the Top Snog Chart, but you my dear, my precious little thang, you are #1 on the Sex Chart.
Your willingness to be unguarded and in the moment has taught me the beauty of Sex.
For that I owe you a spanking.
That Sex was a deal heavily laden with great amounts of emotion and spiritual importance.
It was not that I had ever experienced mind-blowing Sex under these conditions, to the contrary, Sex has always been a little disappointing. Even when I thought I was ‘deeply’ in love.
So I always felt as if I wasn’t in Love enough or something.
Perhaps I was autistic in love?
A tad slow. Detached. Too self involved.
After my recent break up I decided that it was obvious I needed to have no Sex whatsoever. I was about to embark on this journey of celibacy (I did it before for nearly 2 years). I was all set for it, but then I had this conversation with a friend in her kitchen.
Over perogies and fried onion she told me about her cousin from Israel who radiated sexual energy. How that vibe affected everyone around her. In my mind I imagined that scene in ‘Like Water for Chocolate’ where everyone who ate the pheasant with rose petals was overcome with raunchiness.
Something inside me flicked. A little Sex switch.
OK. It’s time to have Sex.
But with Who? When? Where?
Then it struck me…
www.craigslist.org
I put up and ad and found a willing man to help me out with my needs. Although I consider myself queer, I felt that it was time for some penis in my life.
I will call my first emailer Mr. White.
Mr. White was rather ordinary. I wasn’t satisfied.
Back to craigslist. Changed my ad.
Curvy woman seeks older man for rendezvous.
Come over to my place. We get stoned, We laugh, you massage me. We have sex.
You must be able to make me laugh.
88 emails and half an hour later…
I make my choice. It’s this mans' picture that seals it, he is cute in a regular way, plus I reckon that I could probably beat him in an arm wrestle. So I return his email.
Mr. Silver. Now Mr. Silver was a funny guy with a hairy belly but a knack for doing accents. An ex-actor now teacher in the Bronx, who had me laughing during Sex, and that is ALWAYS a good thing.OK well not always, but in this case it was perfect.
Mr. Silver and I got ourselves stoned, he gave me a massage and several orgasms.
Praise the Lord.
After he left I suddenly felt so alive.
Sex had woken me up, a shrilling alarm to my napping self. I had been sleeping. I had forgotten what good, fun, sex was like.
Next I wanted some grrl Sex. As it is so much yummier.
The sticky part is that I have always had a really bad time having sex with a woman that I wasn’t in love with, men were easier. Women were intimate. I could never quite let go of that in my head. Believe me, if I told you about my first casual sex experience with a woman, you would understand. That’s for another time though, it is its own story.
This is where a special individual comes into the picture. I’ll call her Miss A+. Now Miss A+ is my new friend. We have been hanging out a lot and I have been feeling that she likes me. Although I have been doing the "Oh I cannot date, I am still hung up on Miss X" thing.
Luckily for me Miss A+ persisted.
On Labor day we hung out in the prospect park and ate some special cookies.
Giggles and flirting abounded. We laid on a sari in the grass near the boathouse. It was a lovely afternoon. Back to my place...
It took a few hours to built up to the snog. Fingers brushing against clothing, running hands along the fabric. You know how it goes.
Move on to the bed to ‘watch a streaming movie on the PC,' head on shoulder, eyes closed for a moment. Taxiing along on the runway toward a kiss.
In my head I am thinking ‘hope she is a good kisser, hope she is a good kisser’
A wishful mantra to complete a wonderful day.
Then finally we kiss.
The great thing about kissing is that you know if someone is good or not within milliseconds.
And yes. She was good. Better than good. This girl excelled.
She shot up to the top 10 of snogs. Though I don’t have a top 10, I barely can count 3 worth mentioning.
Miss A + hits the number 2 position with a bullet. Or a tongue twirl at the case may be.
I will take a short detour to tell you about the one who just beats her.
Insert a sigh here. For this kiss I am going to tell you about, is one of those kisses that sets the standard. It is the blue ribbon that has been in my heart for 5 years.
I’ll call her Superoo.
Originally she was the gf of my male best friend. He would talk about her ALL the time, but she was 3000 km away on the other side of Australia.
I was curled up on the couch stoned out of my head watching Xena and wishing I could be a better queer grrl, not spending my nights at home watching Lucy Lawless "ieieieieieieieieieie" at me.
There was a knock at the door.
I yelled come in as we never locked our doors.
In comes my buddy, he pokes his head around the doorway and smiles at my stoned curled up self.
"Hey Spaniel " he adds ‘sp’ to every ones names.
"Meet Superoo"
And there like an apparition, past the doorway architraving
Superoos' most beautiful face appears. She has a short, short hair and a nose ring. This grrl is perfect. This grrl is fucking unbelievable. I cannot remember the exact way I greeted her. But in my head I see myself jump up off the couch, grabbing Superoo under my arm and running off into the wilderness with her.
I think I just drooled a little out of the side of my mouth, as Homer does with donuts.
Shoot forward 6 months.
Best Friends. Superoo is no longer the gf of my buddy.
I am so in love with her.
It’s a cool night at an arty thing in downtown Perth. I am wearing antenna’s made of pipecleaners and fuzzy balls.
We get our photo taken together by the local press. Yes, we are that cute.
After a while we are standing around, neither of us are too thrilled with the vibe. Superoo turns to me and says "wanna snog"
DO I?!! Need not ask me twice.
We sat on the edge of a gutter opposite a portaloo row.
I understand that doesn’t sound very romantic, but it wasn’t about romance. This was entirely about something else, only I am not sure what exactly.
That moment just before kissing is the most delicious. Nose’s touching , breath intermingling. When our lips finally touched I had those bungy jumps in the belly. That intense pulling that makes you giddy and dreamy.
(I have never got that bungy thing from kissing a guy. That’s the main reason I think I am queer).
Now I cannot be too sure how long we snogged for, but I do know that the party crowd was a lot thinner when we started. There was this young guy who sat across from us , totally engrossed in us. Hell I would have been if I was a bystander. Shit, 2 grrls snogging will stop most people in their tracks.
Furthermore we looked very cute.
Superoo you are my #1.
Back to now…
Miss A+ is one of the sexiest creatures I have ever had the pleasure to sleep with, she is totally open and in her body. That is what makes good sex. Being in your body and not off thinking about what you need at the stupidmarket or who’s birthday you might have forgotten in the past week. That is the key.
Miss A + has also taught me that you don’t need the complication of inlovedness to have fantastic, liberating, wonderful sex.
Miss A+ you might not be #1 on the Top Snog Chart, but you my dear, my precious little thang, you are #1 on the Sex Chart.
Your willingness to be unguarded and in the moment has taught me the beauty of Sex.
For that I owe you a spanking.
posted by D. at Thursday, October 21, 2004
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